Ask HN: Career Advice for a Struggling Dev
7 comments
> going back to my roots and passion for programming.
You have a passion for programming, good to hear, that's a good foundation to build on.
> I'll say what it feels like is going on is this: when I sit down in front of a computer alone to do work, I experience a level of anxiety that is intolerable and makes it impossible to work productively
> One of the most solid things I've noticed these past two years (and looking back at my last job) is when I have someone with me, I can work fine. At my last job when my coworkers were sitting RIGHT next to me, I was fine. But if I have to work alone, then that's when I lose the ability to work
Sounds like maybe you should seek jobs like Site Reliability Engineer or SysAdmin. Basically someone tasked with putting out fires, or ensuring they don't occur in the first place. And make sure the job is as part of a team, working with people in meatspace not remotely.
https://hn.algolia.com/?dateRange=all&page=0&prefix=true&que...
You have a passion for programming, good to hear, that's a good foundation to build on.
> I'll say what it feels like is going on is this: when I sit down in front of a computer alone to do work, I experience a level of anxiety that is intolerable and makes it impossible to work productively
> One of the most solid things I've noticed these past two years (and looking back at my last job) is when I have someone with me, I can work fine. At my last job when my coworkers were sitting RIGHT next to me, I was fine. But if I have to work alone, then that's when I lose the ability to work
Sounds like maybe you should seek jobs like Site Reliability Engineer or SysAdmin. Basically someone tasked with putting out fires, or ensuring they don't occur in the first place. And make sure the job is as part of a team, working with people in meatspace not remotely.
https://hn.algolia.com/?dateRange=all&page=0&prefix=true&que...
Did my thesis during these years. COVID (and remote) really messed everything in my effort to be organized, eventually I fell into procrastination, mild depression, rabbithole of organization methods, and went to a psychologist (too late I would day). I am like you: doing things alone is hard, I'm glad I'm not living alone. It push me to explore things, but still I feel like an headless chicken running randomly. Doing things in the hurry is fun, though I enjoy moment of calm too.
That said, I think nobody succeed working alone. One need discusaiona, support, structure, eventually money. From your little adventure, I see that (1) you still have motivation to work as a Dev, (2) you're bad at running business, and (3) you like teamwork.
I think give it a new try, in something that deal with emergency maybe, where you have a manager that hopefully can manage you well. It's not a start from zero, it's a start with more information about yourself and are valuable for your future manager. Knowing your limits and yourself is a valuable skill. Also go to see a therapist, you might find something too, as I did.
That said, I think nobody succeed working alone. One need discusaiona, support, structure, eventually money. From your little adventure, I see that (1) you still have motivation to work as a Dev, (2) you're bad at running business, and (3) you like teamwork.
I think give it a new try, in something that deal with emergency maybe, where you have a manager that hopefully can manage you well. It's not a start from zero, it's a start with more information about yourself and are valuable for your future manager. Knowing your limits and yourself is a valuable skill. Also go to see a therapist, you might find something too, as I did.
It's nice you know yourself so well. Seems like you were trying to impose more structure with pomodoros? Can't you do that till the regular chaos resumes? Also, as companies grow they hire more socialites. Did you also have intolerable anxiety while posting this? Just curious. FWIW they say you can learn to boss yourself around like a teacher or parent would do.
Software development is intractable. If not, then you're dealing with a falsification of software. Something like simple app development that is heavily over-saturated.
And I've been where you're at right now.
But I'm gonna be blunt and tell you the truth that employers are only looking for highly skilled laborers right now. Now is definitely not the time to be looking for a software development job.
I will also tell you that you have to make a choice. You basically must either give up on the path to exclusive software development knowledge or endure the overcoming of intractable software development.
Life is hard but life is that simple, yes?
And I've been where you're at right now.
But I'm gonna be blunt and tell you the truth that employers are only looking for highly skilled laborers right now. Now is definitely not the time to be looking for a software development job.
I will also tell you that you have to make a choice. You basically must either give up on the path to exclusive software development knowledge or endure the overcoming of intractable software development.
Life is hard but life is that simple, yes?
This sounds like you should get tested for ADHD - since what you’re describing is pretty typical for that. Such as the “Body Doubling” and craving the stimulation/chaos to work effectively.
Sounds like you would prefer a job where you constantly interact with people. Perhaps a tutoring job for junior high, high school, and college students? Is a tech job a necessity for you? Maybe just take a break from tech? Event planner? Recruiter? Sales? Waiter? Social worker? Cabin crew?
I'm about to "give up" on my goal/dream of having a career as a software engineer (indefinitely)
I've been out of work for 3.5 years (Covid end of 2020). I was struggling in the office, but everything going remote was too much for me and I hit a breaking point
I've spent the past almost 2 years trying to get back to working shape. I've tried so many things: open source, freelancing, starting my own coworking discord, timers, schedules, systems which emphasize randomness, pomodoros, side projects, going back to my roots and passion for programming. Basically trying to "figure it out" and gain enough confidence to convince me that I can "do it" full time
I'll say what it feels like is going on is this: when I sit down in front of a computer alone to do work, I experience a level of anxiety that is intolerable and makes it impossible to work productively
I'm about to "give up" and go apply to McDonald's. McDonald's is appealing because it's a fast paced environment. I'm constantly surrounded by people, constantly moving my body around, constantly monitoring/keeping track of lots of stuff. It seems like as long as I'm constantly stimulated in this way with lots of variety and I can apply my OCD-like self-monitoring to my environment, I can do that
One of the most solid things I've noticed these past two years (and looking back at my last job) is when I have someone with me, I can work fine. At my last job when my coworkers were sitting RIGHT next to me, I was fine. But if I have to work alone, then that's when I lose the ability to work
At my last job, I excelled most with monitoring-type stuff, like building dashboards to monitor systems. When stuff broke, I would quite enjoy debugging in kibana (very stimulating process). I enjoyed times of general chaos when our systems broke. But when things settle back down to normal and I have to code and proactively build features, I procrastinate and go downhill
It doesn't just feel like software engineering is intractable. It generally feels any kind of knowledge type work where I imagine myself in some "back office" alone, away from everyone else which feels impossible
In college, I was a great student with all the structure of classes when there were definite deadlines and lots of structure, things kept moving forward. I really struggled with open-ended projects
Anyway, just posting this on the off chance that someone else has gone through something similar and can provide some advice, words of comfort, anything