Ask HN: How do you become a good mentor?
I have recently become a team lead and have a decent amount of experience being an engineer myself, but have found that the hardest part about my new responsibility is figuring out how to be a good mentor and to help the more inexperienced engineers on my team grow. I am not sure exactly what makes a good mentor or how to get there.
1 comments
1. Act with something akin to what in the financial industry is called "fiduciary responsibly" - in other words, act in "their interest" - not in you interests, or that of your profession or any organization - but constantly ask "what is best for your mentee".
2. Understand that "you can't step in the same river twice". Whatever you did for success almost certainly won't work for them. Always keep in mind the "current reality" of the situation, not the historical one.
3. Gather the facts - over time. "First seek to understand" - don't jump into any recommendations.
4. Don't pretend one meeting will accomplish anything. The "minimal effective dose" for mentoring is probably one meeting every two weeks for six months. More frequent over a longer period of time would be better.
5. Take notes. Review your notes from previous interactions each time you interact, and get an update on what was said at that time.
6. Don't give "advice" - give "ideas" and "suggestions". Make it crystal clear that you could be wrong, and encourage the mentee to get other mentors and to simply reject your suggestions if they don't feel it will work for them.
7. Be humble. Don't be a mentor to feed your own ego - your only goal should be to help your mentee grow and win in a way that is best for them.
2. Understand that "you can't step in the same river twice". Whatever you did for success almost certainly won't work for them. Always keep in mind the "current reality" of the situation, not the historical one.
3. Gather the facts - over time. "First seek to understand" - don't jump into any recommendations.
4. Don't pretend one meeting will accomplish anything. The "minimal effective dose" for mentoring is probably one meeting every two weeks for six months. More frequent over a longer period of time would be better.
5. Take notes. Review your notes from previous interactions each time you interact, and get an update on what was said at that time.
6. Don't give "advice" - give "ideas" and "suggestions". Make it crystal clear that you could be wrong, and encourage the mentee to get other mentors and to simply reject your suggestions if they don't feel it will work for them.
7. Be humble. Don't be a mentor to feed your own ego - your only goal should be to help your mentee grow and win in a way that is best for them.
This is fantastic advice! Thank you for your input.