All of you saying "this is a waste of time", "you wouldn't take a second glance", etc. are contradicting yourselves. If you "wouldn't waste your time reading it" why did you? And why are you taking the time to comment? You're giving this site the exact thing it was meant to get...ATTENTION. It obviously was written with humor and meant to attract attention. I am sure he would give a potential employer his qualifications (and experience) once he got their attention and they asked. If you're taking this THAT seriously (cough, cough, run4yourlives) you're obviously the exact kind of person no one would want to work for! I understand that you're upset you don't quite meet the qualifications. ;)