Every kid has got their own needs. I'm watching one adolescent melt down under the peer pressure for performance. As a parent, it's my job to make sure my child is able to survive and thrive when I'm not around. The standard route is high-school and college, but not every person is suited for that straight path.
If he drops out, and gets a GED, it may not be the same straight path, but college is still there, and someone who has worked and taken care of themselves for a bit has a very different take on a college education when they perceive it as something they want and need, rather than something they are supposed to do. When he decides to go to college, it certainly won't be a four-year beery haze.
Nonsense. To take your example of a Brazilian programmer, he doesn't have to stop speaking Portuguese to speak English. Your hypothetical woman has to stop being a woman. Same applies to your other examples of exclusion. If I learn Japanese to participate in the direction of Ruby language, I don't have to stop speaking English, German, or Chinese to do so.
Exclusion based on lack of knowledge is fundamentally different than exclusion based on innate characteristic.
If he drops out, and gets a GED, it may not be the same straight path, but college is still there, and someone who has worked and taken care of themselves for a bit has a very different take on a college education when they perceive it as something they want and need, rather than something they are supposed to do. When he decides to go to college, it certainly won't be a four-year beery haze.