Aaron Swartz: If you talk to any woman in the tech community, it won’t be long before they start telling you stories about disgusting, sexist things guys have said to them. It freaks them out; and rightly so. As a result, the only women you see in tech are those who are willing to put up with all the abuse.
I'm the wrong person to be discussing this. Not every Deaf people think the same things as implied above.
My principles in life is pretty simple. Respect one another and I will love my child regardless s/he is deaf or hearing.
The same question, as you're indicating above about deaf vs hearing babies, is akin to someone asking me what I hope for: Boy or Girl? I say I would love a daughter but no matter which gender that pops out, I will have my undying love ready if not already.
Live and let live is what I try to do for myself and others, including yourself.
Perhaps someone can answer and engage themselves into the questions you've asked. My life principles are too simple to engage myself into this.
One could argue that it's a matter of perspective. Granted there are many challenges in life and this is true for everybody, including myself.
Why "fix" things if I consider myself on a successful path? If you don't see that I am, at least respect that I am comfortable with me being me and satisfied.