I don't drink, primarily due to religious reasons, and it's affected a lot of my work relationships, especially when working at smaller companies. Earlier in my career, Friday afternoons were more about retrospecting, process improvement, and everyone would start with a few beers.
My drinking affected the social vibe of it, and when I didn't drink, majority of people in the room would call it out. It took a lot of self-control not to cave to peer-pressure, but after a while, people respected the decision.
But it was awkward, knowing that people are a little buzzed around the close of the day, and I'm the only sober one. I feel like I've kind of had to stay away from social events because I don't drink, which is a shame because I'd love to hang out and discuss software with people, but can't really fit in socially.
I think the most important thing I'd say to drinkers is that if there's someone who doesn't drink, don't ostracize them or judge them. There's a lot of reasons why people won't drink, religious, personal, etc. And for those non-drinkers, don't go around complaining about the drinking culture, or make others feel uncomfortable. I learned that when I wasn't drinking, others thought I was silently judging them which wasn't the case at all. In the end, it boils down to the principle of not judging others and just having tolerance for one another.
>“Therefore, my advice for the do-it-yourselfers who might want to “reinvent the wheel” as I did would be not to waste so much time on this venture. Buy a car from a dealer, now it is not a problem anymore.”
Building your own car and making something sounds cool, but this really hit home for me. What am I working on, and what problem am I really solving? A good question we should ask ourselves, in my opinion.
My drinking affected the social vibe of it, and when I didn't drink, majority of people in the room would call it out. It took a lot of self-control not to cave to peer-pressure, but after a while, people respected the decision.
But it was awkward, knowing that people are a little buzzed around the close of the day, and I'm the only sober one. I feel like I've kind of had to stay away from social events because I don't drink, which is a shame because I'd love to hang out and discuss software with people, but can't really fit in socially.
I think the most important thing I'd say to drinkers is that if there's someone who doesn't drink, don't ostracize them or judge them. There's a lot of reasons why people won't drink, religious, personal, etc. And for those non-drinkers, don't go around complaining about the drinking culture, or make others feel uncomfortable. I learned that when I wasn't drinking, others thought I was silently judging them which wasn't the case at all. In the end, it boils down to the principle of not judging others and just having tolerance for one another.