Show HN: I'm not a writer, but I've always wanted to write a short story(halfpastsleep.wordpress.com)
halfpastsleep.wordpress.com
Show HN: I'm not a writer, but I've always wanted to write a short story
http://halfpastsleep.wordpress.com/2012/12/02/artificial/
The "lone wanderer losing his mind" is more of a horror trope, and the singularity is of course a very sci-fi concept. I've seen both done before. And the story felt like a simple concatenation of the two.[0]
I don't want to seem pedantic, but it breaks the immersion when there are grammatical errors in the text. One such example would be the sentence[1] "Like it didn’t matter that I have no idea how survived, or even what year it is."
I have no idea how survived either.
A fair attempt though. Give it a few more tries, you'll get the feel down.
[0]: Stories should be less of a concatenation of concepts, and more of a mix. The best sci-fi horror story I've read to date is this: http://creepypasta.wikia.com/wiki/Psychosis
[1]: I almost didn't catch the omission of "be" between "would" and "the" in this sentence. Which would have been very ironic.