The Fight (2012)(dcurt.is)
dcurt.is
The Fight (2012)
http://dcurt.is/the-fight
9 comments
I'm only 29, but to me it seems like getting older is about figuring out what you really value, refining your ideas and pursuing your desires. In other words, figuring out what matters to you.
Some people seem better at finding a clarity of purpose. Others change their minds, reevaluate their lives, shift their preferences and their focus. It's a process that I think a lot of people go through.
You'll go to college and learn about a bunch of different things. Maybe something will click and you'll say "this is what I want to do with the rest of my life," or maybe it'll take you a little while. Maybe you'll take a philosophy class and discover new and interesting ways of thinking about all of this.
I guess I'm just trying to say: don't worry if you don't know what you want to do with your time on this planet. You'll figure it out some day, or at the very least you'll have the search.
Edit: Just want to add that some people don't do anything with their lives and that's okay too. The phrase "do something with your life" bothers me a little just because it makes this assumption that life is this thing that you have to "do something" with (which I'm assuming refers to some kind of accomplishment). We're just sacks of meat experiencing and interacting with the world. Everything on top of that is personal values.
Some people seem better at finding a clarity of purpose. Others change their minds, reevaluate their lives, shift their preferences and their focus. It's a process that I think a lot of people go through.
You'll go to college and learn about a bunch of different things. Maybe something will click and you'll say "this is what I want to do with the rest of my life," or maybe it'll take you a little while. Maybe you'll take a philosophy class and discover new and interesting ways of thinking about all of this.
I guess I'm just trying to say: don't worry if you don't know what you want to do with your time on this planet. You'll figure it out some day, or at the very least you'll have the search.
Edit: Just want to add that some people don't do anything with their lives and that's okay too. The phrase "do something with your life" bothers me a little just because it makes this assumption that life is this thing that you have to "do something" with (which I'm assuming refers to some kind of accomplishment). We're just sacks of meat experiencing and interacting with the world. Everything on top of that is personal values.
I'm not sure if this will help, but I want to say that having such an existential crisis isn't just normal -- it's healthy. Staying up nights reflecting on your life and your choices aren't necessarily indicative of the need for a change: it means you're conscientious about the path you're taking (and relatively few people are -- which is important to note on a forum largely populated with people who want to make a dent in the universe.)
That being said, I think making huge decisions about the directions of your life before you hit a certain threshold of experience is like trying to solve a Wheel of Fortune round with only X's, V's, and I's on the board. It's a better utilization of your time and resources to educate yourself -- whether that's in a classroom or on an online forum -- to prepare yourself for making those decisions.
That being said, I think making huge decisions about the directions of your life before you hit a certain threshold of experience is like trying to solve a Wheel of Fortune round with only X's, V's, and I's on the board. It's a better utilization of your time and resources to educate yourself -- whether that's in a classroom or on an online forum -- to prepare yourself for making those decisions.
I live in a strange duality according to this article. I'm in my mid-20s and have accomplished much of my childhood goals. I knew I wanted to be a professional developer at a young age and have quickly risen to my choice of companies, locations, and roles doing this. I'm aware of my mortality, but death itself doesn't scare me in the sense that if I died tomorrow and had some way to reflect I would certainly not regret any of the things I have or have not done. And not because I've made spectacularly good decisions or have done anything extraordinary; I simply accept the randomness of the world. The thing that really drives me is taming that randomness, eliminating inefficiency with small and clean systems, and helping others do the same. Some cultures seem to be catatonic with death - to me it's an event that happens to all of us - so in practice I fall in line with the article but I guess with different implementation. For me, it is very liberating to live outside of all fear.
What you have managed to accomplish is what I struggle with most every day. Like you, except I am in my early thirties I have accomplished everything I have ever hoped and dreamed of x10. Only difference is I accept death but fear it every day.
I am fearful of what happens "after" OR I fear nothingness, it also makes me very very sad..
I am fearful of what happens "after" OR I fear nothingness, it also makes me very very sad..
My dad, age 76, collapsed at the gym while working out. His trainer performed hands-only CPR on him for 8 minutes before the paramedics arrived. After a few shocks, the paramedics got his heart going again. He spent 3 days in a medically induced coma with reduced body temperature. From there, he spent another 10 day in the hospital and 60 days recovering.
As mentioned in the article, it's extremely rare for people to survive cardiac arrest. My dad is alive for two reasons:
1. Hands-only CPR. It works, and it's dead simple. handsonlycpr.org
2. He was extremely healthy before the incident. He may have been 76, but he also worked out and climbed mountains. Exercising and eating right not only prevents cardiac problems, they also improve your recovery. His body was in a condition to repair itself better than most individuals his age. Being healthy is not just about prevention.
As mentioned in the article, it's extremely rare for people to survive cardiac arrest. My dad is alive for two reasons:
1. Hands-only CPR. It works, and it's dead simple. handsonlycpr.org
2. He was extremely healthy before the incident. He may have been 76, but he also worked out and climbed mountains. Exercising and eating right not only prevents cardiac problems, they also improve your recovery. His body was in a condition to repair itself better than most individuals his age. Being healthy is not just about prevention.
My grandfather had a stroke in his late 70s. He was mowing another elderly lady's lawn (something he did for cash on the side given he was retired) and had a stroke. He fell down behind the mower and was down for 30 minutes before the lady noticed something odd about the fact that the lawnmower engine hadn't moved from one side of the house in that time.
He never fully recovered. He regained some mobility of the paralysed side, but never enough to walk despite our efforts to make him get up and use a rail to walk down the corridor. He could at least help my grandmother with his assisted transfers from bed to wheelchair, which was good considering she was almost as old as well. He was not able to talk properly, but he could communicate well enough. As someone who'd been tending to an avery of hundreds of birds and doing manual labour on his acres of property prior to that, it was the single worst torture for him to be paralysed like that.
He remained incredibly mentally sharp. He'd come to family birthdays and would be sitting at the end of the table with some of hte family around and he'd spot something across the room that no one else saw - a grandchild stealing a sweet from the table or whatnot. He'd struggle to communicate it to us but sure enough his eagle eyes and sharp attention had noticed it.
It was with no doubt that his incredible physical health was what made him even survive. He lived for some 5-8 years after that. It was a terrible life and he felt incredibly depressed and helpless given his previous circumstance, but he was alive and we gave him the best quality of life we could.
In summary, I guess what I'm trying to say via example is that you cannot possibly underestimate the ability for a healthy body to endure trauma that a less healthy body will just give up under. Especailly as you age, your physical health will help you in ways you can never imagine. Don't neglect it.
Oh, and CPR is a phenomenal tool. Being able to provide first aid is one of those things that you hope will never pay off, but when it does it will literally save a life.
He never fully recovered. He regained some mobility of the paralysed side, but never enough to walk despite our efforts to make him get up and use a rail to walk down the corridor. He could at least help my grandmother with his assisted transfers from bed to wheelchair, which was good considering she was almost as old as well. He was not able to talk properly, but he could communicate well enough. As someone who'd been tending to an avery of hundreds of birds and doing manual labour on his acres of property prior to that, it was the single worst torture for him to be paralysed like that.
He remained incredibly mentally sharp. He'd come to family birthdays and would be sitting at the end of the table with some of hte family around and he'd spot something across the room that no one else saw - a grandchild stealing a sweet from the table or whatnot. He'd struggle to communicate it to us but sure enough his eagle eyes and sharp attention had noticed it.
It was with no doubt that his incredible physical health was what made him even survive. He lived for some 5-8 years after that. It was a terrible life and he felt incredibly depressed and helpless given his previous circumstance, but he was alive and we gave him the best quality of life we could.
In summary, I guess what I'm trying to say via example is that you cannot possibly underestimate the ability for a healthy body to endure trauma that a less healthy body will just give up under. Especailly as you age, your physical health will help you in ways you can never imagine. Don't neglect it.
Oh, and CPR is a phenomenal tool. Being able to provide first aid is one of those things that you hope will never pay off, but when it does it will literally save a life.
Some previous discussion (in particular, I recommend the thread caused by ForrestN's comment): https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=4740540
Mods: You should probably add (2012) to the headline. Worth reading again, though.
Here please read earlier discussions on it https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=4740540
As I read this I realise that the ambitions and dreams I had in my 20's have changed. Now that I have two children I have a greater fear of dying, which is more because I fear not seeing them growing up and not being there to protect them from harm when / if it arrives.
Funny how your priorities can change so vastly.
Funny how your priorities can change so vastly.
remember to go against your instinct
So far I had formed the impression one should be going with their instinct. Are some instincts bad and some good? What's the test for telling which is which?
So far I had formed the impression one should be going with their instinct. Are some instincts bad and some good? What's the test for telling which is which?
I think he means the tendencies which overtake us if we don't think deliberately about them, like procrastination. Procrastination is my worst instinct, and at times the biggest obstacle between myself and my goals.
Changing your life to have different tendencies seems elusively tricky. My biggest one is the opposite of yours: stepping away from work.
Have you found ways around such obstacles?
Have you found ways around such obstacles?
It's basically saying to step outside your comfort zone (but yes, I don't think "instinct" is the best choice of word).
Amazing story, and amazing writing!
By the way, the most spectacular story along these lines I've heard is that of Anna Bågenholm, a Swedish doctor who was trapped under ice, in flowing meltwater for 80 minutes [1]. She made a nearly full recovery after being "dead" for hours. Read the article, it makes you wonder what life really is.
1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anna_B%C3%A5genholm
By the way, the most spectacular story along these lines I've heard is that of Anna Bågenholm, a Swedish doctor who was trapped under ice, in flowing meltwater for 80 minutes [1]. She made a nearly full recovery after being "dead" for hours. Read the article, it makes you wonder what life really is.
1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anna_B%C3%A5genholm
While the story and the thoughts it provokes are certainly good, the conclusion is way off. At least in a buddhist's way of seeing things who should be experts in this regard. An interesting and enlightening article is the following: http://buddhism.lib.ntu.edu.tw/FULLTEXT/JR-PHIL/ew27149.htm
Predictably, it is causing me to reflect on my own life. I'm sitting up in my bed, typing on my smartphone at 1:39 am, exploring the feeling that I have no idea what I'm fighting for.
At the risk of diluting the genuineness of Dustin's words with cliches of my own, I actually now realize I don't know what I'm doing with my life. Which is surprising to me, because I've been lulled into absorbing my own persona of "guy who has plans and ambition" — I'm sure many of you can relate.
I'm a senior in high school, off to college next year. I'm supposed to be studying cognitive science and human-computer interaction. I have worked hard, inside and outside the classroom, to get where I am, or so people tell me.
I have aspirations of greatness too naive and disgustingly grandiose to formulate into actionable plans. I legitimately see threads connecting all reality — from the power of design to the eerie harmony of the human experience — and that it is my duty to weave them into visibility.
Worse, I believe I have the duty to change the world, because I regularly fantasize about doing so. I have been raised to believe that "if I will it, it is no dream."
I have the dreams, some very specific, others abstract, but I can't always make sense of them when I wake up.
And how do I know which are worth fighting for?