Read something that actually interests you and you like. Choose to start with something short so you get over your anxiety, because I suspect there is an anxiety component.
I've been without work for over a year now so I'm still programming the classic way and using ai chats in the browser. When I'll work again I'll use them.
I think the best thing to do is separate programming for work and pleasure.
I can't believe so many people on HN think that healthcare in the US is under the free market. Lol.
For starter, can you cure a person if you're not part of the AMA cartel? You can't, the State will ruin you.
Can you open an hospital without being allowed by other hospitals, your competition? In many States you can't.
If you find and innovative way to organize labor, can you test it? Nope.
Just the first few things that come to mind.
Healthcare in the US is much less free market than in European countries like Italy, and these are the results.
But it's amazing that people on HN din't see it, what happened to this place?
You are mourning your parents, your company and maybe you are mourning having to work towards something, maybe even mourning the financial worry itself.
Thing with mourning is that now things seem to be over but they will start again eventually. It's all about time. Also I'm sorry you feel alone, I hope you'll find a way to manage that.
picking up another framework can be painful, but react is very popular so it has many good resources. Also make sure you learn the underlying language first, you may think you understand it enough but you probably don't and it will slow you down.
The problem is that the outcome, what clients want, it's often mot clear, changes, sometimes depends on other people in the client's org, etc and it's a mess to have a fixed price contract in these cases
I feel I'm gonna puke writing this message. Me and my mother both have no income except some government welfare which is subject to many variables (previous month 220 euro, this month 500 euro). My mother has been put on a list to get eye surgery so she can hopefully regain sight in her left eye after many years. The surgery is paid by the State but she will have to go to another city which is far away. We don' know when she will be called so we can't pre-plan the travel to get better deals. 300euro may help us cover the bus and one night at the hotel.