The throwaway was at positive karma until your kneejerk misreading, which is the risk that I wanted to avoid. After your comment and changing of the conversation with the ad hominem, it went from +4 or +5 to -8.
Actually, I believe you did not read my comments at all.
I will never post on certain subjects except from a throwaway, regardless of the content of my post. You don't know this, but I wasn't familiar with the given name Roni and as I first read through the article thought that the author was probably male, and the harasser gay, since actually I've had this experience.
Except you know what I did? I actually communicated and I had zero problems afterward with the individual. I suppose if I were female instead of male I should have gone so far as being raped instead of opening my mouth and clearly explaining the situation?
I call you to actually read my comments and then offer a retraction of your own ad-hominem attack of misogyny (because you did not read my comments to begin with).
It's not about whether she "feels" his behavior constitutes harassment. She has a choice about whether to be contacted by him and she has to tell him in no uncertain terms exactly what she wants. She has to say, "Please don't contact me again. I am not interested in having you in my life in any way. Move on." (not a quote, my suggestion).
This is like her quote,
>"He handed me the latest Red Hot Chili Peppers CD (Stadium Arcadium, not great) and asked if we could eat dinner together. I panicked; I hadn’t seen Danny since middle school and didn’t want to see him now. But I also didn’t want to hurt his feelings and felt touched by his gift. I took him to the cafeteria and made awkward conversation until I faked an excuse and left."
Really? Why would she mention that his gift "Stadium Arcadium" was "not great"??
What does it matter? But at that part of the story, she literally went with him to the cafeteria and ate with him.
Like, where at any point does she clearly simply say, "Do not contact me again in any way. I am not interested in having you in my life. Please move on." or "I told you not to contact me. Please don't do this" etc.
Women are completely in the wrong if they refuse to unambiguously state what they want from communications but expect that they can just "feel" a certain way. They have a duty to tell the person unambiguously.
By the way this goes the other way too. A woman can be totally, completely into you and you can be oblivious. In that case too, if she does want something she needs to just say it.
There are literally entire articles written for how a woman can go about planting the seed in a man's brain that maybe he should ask her out. It's ridiculous. women can communicate and they have an obligation to do so, not to "be touched and take him to the cafeteria and make conversation" while thinking that they are doing so with a harasser. come on.
"Don't message me SO MUCH or I will BLOCK YOU" sounds exactly like "I told my cyber stalker that if he didn't ease up on how much he was messaging me - my phone was beeping multiple times per day, bothering me at all hours - he could forget about breakfast in the morning from here on out - the next time he showed up at my apartment, I'd send him home with the night bus as soon as we were done having sex." (not a quote, I'm making fun here.)
Like, seriously. They're still facebook friends through all this?
The woman in the article says "When I got a Facebook account in 2006 he found me again and, not wanting to be rude, I accepted his friend request. He often sent me rambling accounts of his day-to-day life. I usually didn’t respond, but sometimes I messaged back if I was bored or lonely."
Oh really? Sometimes you messaged back if you were bored or lonely?
This is how you end up in a happy marriage with the guy twenty years later after you've finished your studies and want to start settling down.
The guy's behavior is COMPLETELY BATSHIT INSANE and there is ZERO excuse for ANY of what is described.
At the same time, he's not a stalker until she unequivocally tells him that she would not like any further contact and asking him to move on. I cannot believe that she is a writer, yet this bad at communication.
What is so hard about saying, "I don't want this. Leave me alone." Jesus H. Christ. I hope I never, ever have anything to do with a woman like this one, because who knows if she really consented when I make out with her in my or her bedroom?
Does she have an inability to open her mouth and communicate what is going on? Jesus.
All that said, (I only glanced through the article) the guy's behavior completely surpasses anything even remotely justifiable. He's in the wrong. She's in the wrong for not telling him.
Actually, I believe you did not read my comments at all.
I will never post on certain subjects except from a throwaway, regardless of the content of my post. You don't know this, but I wasn't familiar with the given name Roni and as I first read through the article thought that the author was probably male, and the harasser gay, since actually I've had this experience.
Except you know what I did? I actually communicated and I had zero problems afterward with the individual. I suppose if I were female instead of male I should have gone so far as being raped instead of opening my mouth and clearly explaining the situation?
I call you to actually read my comments and then offer a retraction of your own ad-hominem attack of misogyny (because you did not read my comments to begin with).