Innovation for baby delivery.(thingamababy.com)
thingamababy.com
Innovation for baby delivery.
http://www.thingamababy.com/baby/2007/01/baby_patent_his.html
10 comments
I know absolutely nothing about baby delivery, but I don't see how this could go wrong.
I am also not medically trained, but I was present during my wife's two childbirths. I am strongly opposed to described method and would not advice anyone, let alone my wife, to undergo such treatment. Why ? Because delivering a child is a process, during which many things may go wrong and there's a number of possible complications. Baby is stressed, mother is stressed, no one knows in advance, what can go wrong. The staff needs time to react and help the baby (and possibly mother) if needed. I can't see them helping anyone with a machine spinning so fast that centrifugal force ejects a baby. Actually, I can't even imagine the force needed for that, would probably kill the baby and mother.
I voted you up because my son, born six months ago, underwent periodic slowdowns in heart rate because the umbilical chord was wrapped around his neck.
And I know absolutely nothing about air pressure, but it does seem like it'd be a lot to fight against. Given that an average baby's head has about 97 square inches (cross-section), and 1 atmosphere is about 14.7 PSI, it must take almost 1433 pounds of force to eject a baby! Given a baby's average weight of 7.5 pounds, that means you'd have to spin at 191 Gs just to overcome air pressure; you've still got to fight friction!
Mothers are amazing.
Mothers are amazing.
It is evident you know nothing about baby delivery from the latter part of your sentence.
For a split second I thought it was a newly discovered da Vinci sketch.
This obviously is a joke. I mean, a bell rings when the baby is ejected. :)
It is unfortunate that many people here actually believed this to be some kind of invention. huh..
"The carnie gynecologist then pulls a hand brake to quickly slow the mother’s rotation so that she can safely exit the ride."
This really gave it away.
This really gave it away.
I'm sorry, but this just made me literally laugh out loud:
"The mother is then spun around and around at a speed the gynecologist has predetermined will be sufficient to dislodge the infant (or as the patent states, "the fetus"). The apparent maximum g-force for the machine is 7."
Priceless.
I want to see this in action.
"The mother is then spun around and around at a speed the gynecologist has predetermined will be sufficient to dislodge the infant (or as the patent states, "the fetus"). The apparent maximum g-force for the machine is 7."
Priceless.
I want to see this in action.
Many people here are taking this invention seriously. seriously!
How about harnessing space-time geometry? In other words, why not use a birthing chair so gravity is assisting?
http://www.google.com/search?q=birthing+chair
http://www.google.com/search?q=birthing+chair
Invented by a man, I'm sure.
"Inventors: George B. and Charlotte E. Blonsky of New York City."
Looks like a husband and wife made it together, actually. It's just mind boggling to me that more than one person thought this was a good idea.
Looks like a husband and wife made it together, actually. It's just mind boggling to me that more than one person thought this was a good idea.
And this idea is patented. Imagine what it the intelligence of person at patenting office must be.
And so many of you think patents should be abolished...
I thought this would be a riff on the 'machine that goes "ping"', but no, it's completely insane.
Wheel of morality, turn turn turn, tell us the lesson that we should learn.
Wheel of morality, turn turn turn, tell us the lesson that we should learn.
dough rollers