My wife and I adopted a boy when he was just a few months old. He was born addicted to drugs, and I've read that even newborns experience
trauma when they are adopted because they can tell they are no longer with their mother.
He is now six and we've been having behavioral issues with him pretty much his whole life. He isn't ADHD but exhibits several of the same behaviors. "Trauma-based ADHD symptoms" or something like that. We finally found a good counsellor (yes, for a 6yo) and are scheduled to have some tests done with a neuropsychologist.
I'm concerned that medication is prescribed too quickly, without trying other options first, but we are hoping to find something to help calm him down a bit. We don't know if he has some kind of chemical imbalance from the drugs that were in his system when he was developing, or if it is trauma. Most of the time he is a great kid, but he is often very defiant, more so than your typical kid.
Anyway, I'm not sure what my point is other than to rant a bit, but your comment about ADHD and trauma caught my attention. Thanks for sharing.
Hang in there! And focus on the fun times. I'm assuming you're already tried many things, but if you haven't talked to your pediatrician, he might be able to help. Melatonin helped one of our foster kids fall asleep, but yeah, it didn't help him sleep all the way through the night. Good luck!
Just curious, when you say you do LEGOs, you mean buy a set and follow the instructions (which is fine and what I assume people mean when they talk about LEGOs)?
Or do you mean sit with a pile of LEGOs and come up with your own ships/cars/toys? When I was a kid (70's/80's) we would just get boxes of bricks and make our own things, but it seems like pre-built sets are the most popular thing now.
And yes we have plenty of pre-build sets in our house, but I feel like kids are missing out on the free-style aspect.
Adding my name to the list of people greatly impacted by BBSs in the 80's and forward.
I became good friends with some locals that ran a WWIV board. I'm still friends with them, and a few others that used their BBS, to this day.
My favorite though was TProBBS that incorporated a D&D style game. I remember there was an option to buy and upgrade a ship, too. Then you could explore the ocean looking for treasure and sea monsters and sometimes battle others.
You could upgrade your "bank" for better security, which hardly anyone did. I played a rogue character and was able to steal a lot of money from others before they realized how important it was to upgrade your security systems.
Fun times. Good memories.
Sounds like Elden Ring. I started playing it recently and got annoyed at how often I died. But I realized that's part of the learning process. It's still annoying but at least I can see it for what it is.
I'm so old, the first time I connected to a different computer was through a 300 baud modem. The Internet didn't exist yet, just BBSs. The local BBS scene was a blast. I'm still friends with several people I met back then.
I was really sad when I heard about this. I've enjoyed the Smothers Brothers since I was a kid and found my parents' records of them. "Mom Always Liked You Best," falling into a vat of Chocolate, Streets of Laredo, My Old Man, John Henry, Crabs Walk Sidways, Pretoria, etc, etc. If you have never watched them before, look up a few of these.
I was fortunate enough to see them in person when they performed in our city about a decade ago.
Did they ever do just a straight music album? That would have been great. Streets of Laredo starts off so beautifully.
I was really sad when I heard about this. I've enjoyed the Smothers Brothers since I was a kid and found my parents' records of them. "Mom Always Liked You Best," falling into a vat of Chocolate, Streets of Laredo, My Old Man, John Henry, Crabs Walk Sidways, Pretoria, etc, etc. If you have never watched them before, look up a few of these.
I was fortunate enough to see them in person when they performed in our city about a decade ago.
Did they ever do just a straight music album? That would have been great. Streets of Laredo starts off so beautifully.
I remember spending a lot of time playing this game. Even my mom liked it, and she never played video games. I wonder if she'll want to play this version. Great to see it again!
Side note, have you seen Magna-Tiles? My 4yo son loves them. They have magnets along the edges so you can easily stick pieces together and build structures. They are bigger than regular LEGOs, more along the lines of Duplo. And they can be pricey, but they are tons of fun for little ones! Especially when their favorite thing is to knock down whatever you build.
Keep up the good work! My wife and I have fostered kids and ended up adopting a young boy (we got him when he was 4 months old, adopted him when he turned 2, and he is 4 now). He is very different than our two biological kids and it's been a challenge for us. But it's worth it in the long run. You are doing a good thing.
If you need support, there should be a lot of resources in your community, if not online. Don't hesitate to ask for help.
But finally, try not to alienate him from his mother. Don't bad-mouth her in front of him. If possible, it would be good for him to a relationship with her.
Search function on HN? Scroll to the very bottom and there is a search box. It doesn't seem intuitive. It seems like it should be at the top of the page.