I highly encourage not falling into Dreger's article or engage in what is generally dismissed and discredited theory(ies) that surrounded all this. The article reference ends up less about the evidence and scientific rigor and more about the underlying drama. It is problematic, and if you want what I would consider a better take on it (and the subsequent book), I would read this: https://juliaserano.blogspot.com/2015/04/alice-dreger-and-ma...
>I think the disagreement comes from the way that activists insist that the best solution for treating [gender dysphoria, etc] is to "socially and heavy handedly force everyone to complete the illusion by treating transgender individuals as indistinguishable from their biological counterparts in every way".
Here we see that the term 'illusion' is doing a lot of heavy lifting in the background, and implies some kind of bias or preconceived notion of "real" vs "fake" or "imaginary". If this is what you get from advocates and activists, then I think you either receive this through a filter of some kind, or carry said filter within.
>That's not the only solution for treating [gender dysphoria, etc], just the current (and perhaps uniquely) American one, and it comes with a variety of problems the obvious of which stem from significant biological factors that make the illusion impossible to complete (sports, etc).
This is the treatment method that has consistently demonstrated the best outcomes for the people concerned over time. It is not uniquely American, as it was pioneered in Europe before taken to the next level in the US, among other countries/regions. Again, furtherance of the idea there is an 'illusion that must be completed'. This is not the case. Trans people are very aware just how much they do or do not fit in compared to the average population at large. No one needs to point this out to them, nor does anyone need to coddle them. By far, just being treated as how one wishes to be treated goes a long, long way.
In regards to sports, if the person in question has medically transitioned and has done so with HRT for some year(s) (I think 2 is the baseline minimum from studies?), then their overall performance in sports will be measurably less then their peers of the same gender in most instances. The few that excel are not statistically more significant than the few natural athletes who excel due to some developmental advantage (larger heart/lung capacity, etc) due to early or sustained training, genetic factors, etc. At least this is what the preliminary data is showing us so far. On average, the distribution remains about the same and on par with other athletes. This is almost always a talking point/dog whistle that is, once you peel the onion, much ado about nothing. Just like most all other contentious talking points about transgender folks, which do not vary significantly from the same points about gay rights, marriage equality, racial segregation/integration debates, or equality in voting and women's rights, etc, etc.
I am glad you had such a warm welcome :)
I too, did not lose my job either; however, my reception was not as nice as yours. I moved on ten months or so later, and getting a "fresh start" where I was not known for anything other than my bona fides and my cv/resume, was wonderful.
I am grateful for my daughter, my friend, and my cat. That I have a house, a job, stable food and income.
I am grateful that I am able to live my life relatively free and in relative safety, without needing to be ashamed or hide who and what I am. That I can live completely and authentically me, and by doing so, can live my values and principles.
But really, in the absence of all of that, I am just happy to be alive and see my daughter grow into the beautiful young adult she is becoming.
I started with cardio and calisthenics/weights videos, which I found to be great to establish a baseline level of fitness. After a while it became a bit too repetitive for me. Then I combined those videos with a treadmill for some added variety. Eventually I tried a rowing trainer, and combined with the kinomap app and concept's online challenges, I found my jam. Rowing felt great to me, it did not irritate my knees, I felt as though I had used all of my body, and the rhythm of rowing was engaging and almost a zen like movement for me. Some good music, maybe a rowing video/race/challenge on the app, and 30 minutes+ just fly by. I am now considering a rowing skiff and try my hand at actual rowing or joining a rowing club. As an introvert, the latter is still in question for me.
My goal was general cardio/lung fitness, and I tracked this with my resting heart rate and weight, and during exercising I used a heart rate monitor to track training zones. Apps tracked all the rowing metrics.
Starting from day zero is really hard, and having the discipline to stick with it at first is very difficult for me. At some point it stopped feeling like punishing myself and became about proving to myself that I can do this, and it became rewarding and a bit validating.
At my peak, I was exercising from five to six times a week. I built up to this level slowly over time, as I pushed myself with various challenges. It really is a sort of personal journey.
The benefits were mostly intangible. Mood and ability to handle stressful situations improved, my energy was generally better throughout the day, and food made me less sleepy. My sleep quality improved, which had further knock-on effects to everything. I felt good about myself and being able to meet the goals of the various challenges offered, and my own. If I can do this, what other goals can I accomplish? I felt better about myself as I set a goal and could see the progress and meet it. This was a thing I did just for me, and it helped me feel good about myself. Depression could no longer gain a hold on/over me.
The tangible benefits were on the scale, and visible physical changes. I became more defined and lean, and this felt nice to see something positive in the mirror.
I had a long break last year, as a lot of life happened. I am slowly getting back into it, and whereas I still grumble a bit about not feeling like it, once I finish, I always feel better for having done so. Starting over is not fun, but the difference is that now I know I can.
Second this, and it is good for all ages with a nice variety of exercises. My daughter (17) was both entertained by the challenges, mini-games, and topping previous scores. We also have a boxing game that is beat/rhythm based called fitness boxing 2: rhythm and exercise. This can also be done with two players, so it can get competitive. The downside to these games is the overly cheery/chatty characters can grate after a while, as the dialogue can get a bit repetitive.
Letting go can be very difficult. I would advocate for all suggestions already made in the comments so far, particularly working out and setting outside work goals. This helps create outlets and boundaries for yourself.
I try to remind myself that even if things are wrong, poor design, bad technology direction dictated from on high, even apathetic or stubborn colleagues, etc., I continue to try to find as much wiggle room as I can to make it as not terrible as possible, and never stop advocating for a better approach. I have found that repeating yourself enough, with evidence and data, eventually leads to others repeating it back to you as some new idea. It is a long game approach, but it does not fill that immediate change/feedback desire.
Ultimately you choose to change your company, or change your company. It is up to you to choose which one is worth your time investment.
If you enjoy reading, I would recommend reading books in English and referring to an English to <your native language> dictionary to build your vocabulary. Not only will this teach yourself more words to choose from, it will also promote a more natural flow in speaking and writing.