Ask HN: What's your best quitting story?
14 comments
Doing a nasty or snarky "I quit" may feel good in the short term, but it won't help your career goals. Don't bash your boss on the way out. Don't say a negative word about anyone if you have an exit interview. Stick to your party line of "I have a developer role, which is the right career choice for me. The pay is very good too."
Somewhere down the line, someone will formally or informally do a background check on you. You don't want to give someone a reason to subtly backstab you later. If you do something big on the way out, it can haunt you later, and you may never find out. Be as professional as possible, document everything you know that may help someone, and work full days during your notice period.
Now that I've said all this, you asked for stories...
- A former colleague gave the minimal possible notice "because every day I stay costs me a lot of money." He was leaving to start a t-shirt company. (He was a great guy, and not as arrogant as the story sounds.)
- A friend at an investment bank (which was notorious for perp-walking people out when they were let go during the financial meltdown) quit, and gave his notice from his new firm's Bloomberg account.
These actually sound fairly lame. I wonder if ohters have better. :-)
Somewhere down the line, someone will formally or informally do a background check on you. You don't want to give someone a reason to subtly backstab you later. If you do something big on the way out, it can haunt you later, and you may never find out. Be as professional as possible, document everything you know that may help someone, and work full days during your notice period.
Now that I've said all this, you asked for stories...
- A former colleague gave the minimal possible notice "because every day I stay costs me a lot of money." He was leaving to start a t-shirt company. (He was a great guy, and not as arrogant as the story sounds.)
- A friend at an investment bank (which was notorious for perp-walking people out when they were let go during the financial meltdown) quit, and gave his notice from his new firm's Bloomberg account.
These actually sound fairly lame. I wonder if ohters have better. :-)
"Don't save a negative word..." -- what about the C-Suite that gets off on humiliating people? I have mixed feelings on this advice because it seems highly selfish when you consider that someone else will suffer in your place. Would the world not be better if more people took a stand against the inept and abusive? Of course, this is highly subjective and you have to be honest about the reason you are leaving. Is it just a personal problem, or are other people being wronged -- if other people, consider taking a stand.
Everyone else who is there is an adult too. If they don't like it, they can leave. There are better ways to make a moral stand in the workplace.
Tech is indeed a small world.
The first story speaks to another issue: How long do I stay in order to guarantee a smooth transition, when the project I'm working on is two years old with no end in sight? (And is generally a god-awful mess, both from a technical and project-management point of view?)
I feel like I'll be dinged for leaving them "high and dry" but... my employment is specifically at will. I'm tempted to terminate it from my end, and get on with my new career.
The first story speaks to another issue: How long do I stay in order to guarantee a smooth transition, when the project I'm working on is two years old with no end in sight? (And is generally a god-awful mess, both from a technical and project-management point of view?)
I feel like I'll be dinged for leaving them "high and dry" but... my employment is specifically at will. I'm tempted to terminate it from my end, and get on with my new career.
It's written into most contracts as 2 weeks, occasionally 1 or 4. If you can pull it off, offer 4. No need to go longer than that. Start organizing yourself before you had notice.
At the bank I mentioned earlier, someone gave notice, and was immediately walked off the floor by security. He had organized his work completely so that it was an easy transition despite him not being there. Everyone had good things to say about him afterwards. (And he got paid for the notice period, which is standard if someone says, "Don't bother coming in.")
At the bank I mentioned earlier, someone gave notice, and was immediately walked off the floor by security. He had organized his work completely so that it was an easy transition despite him not being there. Everyone had good things to say about him afterwards. (And he got paid for the notice period, which is standard if someone says, "Don't bother coming in.")
Unfortunately, I don't have any good quitting stories for you though I have quit jobs that sound like yours in the past.
Some of the best words of wisdom I received about negative situations like this: "If it feels good to say it, just don't." Be kind, honorable, and walk way as the bigger person...because that's the story you'll want to tell when you look back at this.
Some of the best words of wisdom I received about negative situations like this: "If it feels good to say it, just don't." Be kind, honorable, and walk way as the bigger person...because that's the story you'll want to tell when you look back at this.
Well said! Fantastic advice.
I have been in the same spot a number of times, particularly early in my career. It is best to be honourable, kind, and a bigger person. Once there was a company that I really just wanted to tell off and walk out. But after giving my two weeks notice, despite being ridiculed and mocked, I kept my cool, finished my work and documentation, and left.
Years later I was doing some hiring for my own business and a resume came across my desk, the lead ridiculer from this previous job. I gave him my standard interview, only lightly touching on the fact that at one point he had been my bosses boss. The look on his face when he first saw me was worth every fake smile I had ever given him. He completed the interview, passed, and rejected my offer. I have never felt bad about my interactions with him or that company... but I think he did.
I have been in the same spot a number of times, particularly early in my career. It is best to be honourable, kind, and a bigger person. Once there was a company that I really just wanted to tell off and walk out. But after giving my two weeks notice, despite being ridiculed and mocked, I kept my cool, finished my work and documentation, and left.
Years later I was doing some hiring for my own business and a resume came across my desk, the lead ridiculer from this previous job. I gave him my standard interview, only lightly touching on the fact that at one point he had been my bosses boss. The look on his face when he first saw me was worth every fake smile I had ever given him. He completed the interview, passed, and rejected my offer. I have never felt bad about my interactions with him or that company... but I think he did.
> It is best to be honourable, kind, and a bigger person.
Or, if you're not feeling particularly kind, "it's better to just keep your mouth shut". As your story demonstrates, technology is a winding road along an island that's smaller than you think; you never know when you'll cross a bridge again. Better not to burn it.
Or, if you're not feeling particularly kind, "it's better to just keep your mouth shut". As your story demonstrates, technology is a winding road along an island that's smaller than you think; you never know when you'll cross a bridge again. Better not to burn it.
Not really a quitting story but...
My girlfriend had a god awful marketing job a few years back, and the new director was a bit of a sleaze. (Trying to book them in the same room on a business trip etc, etc.) Anyway, he seemed to be quite put off that she wouldn't play ball so to say, so he made up some bullshit to fire her. Being in the Czech Republic, this involves about 5 months severance pay. (Normally you'd have to work for a couple of months before going, but he wanted her gone immediately)
After she signed the legal paperwork for the termination she gave him a big smile and a thank you. She had actually been headhunted a few weeks earlier, for a great job in Italy for a good company at triple her salary. She was about to quit outright (and forfeit the 5 months pay) when he fired her.
Apparently the look on his face was priceless, the company lawyer was desperately trying not to laugh, and my girl said she would enjoy shopping in Milan with his generosity.
Good fun.
My girlfriend had a god awful marketing job a few years back, and the new director was a bit of a sleaze. (Trying to book them in the same room on a business trip etc, etc.) Anyway, he seemed to be quite put off that she wouldn't play ball so to say, so he made up some bullshit to fire her. Being in the Czech Republic, this involves about 5 months severance pay. (Normally you'd have to work for a couple of months before going, but he wanted her gone immediately)
After she signed the legal paperwork for the termination she gave him a big smile and a thank you. She had actually been headhunted a few weeks earlier, for a great job in Italy for a good company at triple her salary. She was about to quit outright (and forfeit the 5 months pay) when he fired her.
Apparently the look on his face was priceless, the company lawyer was desperately trying not to laugh, and my girl said she would enjoy shopping in Milan with his generosity.
Good fun.
This one woman I used to work with didn't just burn bridges, she nuked them from orbit. We were contractors on a military base. She was in configuration management. She was in a meeting with a bunch of the division managers, it was a stressful day.
In the middle of the meeting, she blurts out, "Fuck this. I don't need this shit."
She gets up, leaves the meeting, and walks back to her desk. She drops her stuff in a box, walks out of the building, and drops her base pass off at the main gate.
Nobody heard from her again.
In the middle of the meeting, she blurts out, "Fuck this. I don't need this shit."
She gets up, leaves the meeting, and walks back to her desk. She drops her stuff in a box, walks out of the building, and drops her base pass off at the main gate.
Nobody heard from her again.
I used to work as a tech support rep for a huge cable company and hated it. I had to do a 2 hour commute to work and deal with angry customers all day over the phone, my company often released products that don't work, like we rolled out a disastrous digital phone service, a video-on-demand service that should still be in pre-beta and it was my job to support all these bad products.
As I worked for the cable company, I also had a side project app I was working on. Soon my app started making money, in 6 months it made its first $1000. Then sales started doubling every week, in the next 2 months my app was making more than double my fulltime job's salary at the cable company.
I hated my fulltime job but i didn't want to quit a stable job. Unable to make the decision to quit, I called in sick one day, and then stayed home for 2 weeks, I was secretly hoping to be fired. I showed up at work 2 weeks later and no one seemed to notice I was gone. Some people thought I was just working a different shift. My supervisor didn't really notice. So I finally decided it was time to quit. Told my supervisor I was quitting because I started a new business I wanted to focus on instead. She was very cool about it, told me they like me and would hire me again if I every wanted to come back and that was it.
As I worked for the cable company, I also had a side project app I was working on. Soon my app started making money, in 6 months it made its first $1000. Then sales started doubling every week, in the next 2 months my app was making more than double my fulltime job's salary at the cable company.
I hated my fulltime job but i didn't want to quit a stable job. Unable to make the decision to quit, I called in sick one day, and then stayed home for 2 weeks, I was secretly hoping to be fired. I showed up at work 2 weeks later and no one seemed to notice I was gone. Some people thought I was just working a different shift. My supervisor didn't really notice. So I finally decided it was time to quit. Told my supervisor I was quitting because I started a new business I wanted to focus on instead. She was very cool about it, told me they like me and would hire me again if I every wanted to come back and that was it.
I worked at a place where we all fit on two floors, so less than 200 people. The staff had to take the long way around to work because the CEO didn't like seeing "the rabble" walk past his sound-proofed frosted-glass office. Him touring the work area was an event to be feared. The pay was less than all our competitors, they let one of the original staff go (she had years of experience and did an excellent job) because she asked for a paltry sub-3% raise to make ends meet. She was the voice on the IVR so they had to pay more than her raise to get a new voice recorded once she left. You could work an extra 30-60 minutes every day and never be thanked, but don't you dare take an extra 3 minutes for lunch. High pressure? My manager left to go home one day and dropped dead on the pavement of a heart attack determined to be from stress (he survived).
I gave my notice politely and gratefully. I was late to my own leaving party because I worked a job through to completion. I was invited to take my old job back any time I wanted, and I got a great reference which helped me get a way better job. Nobody I knew still works there.
As good as it might feel, don't ragequit. Regardless of all the good you might have done before, people will remember the most recent big thing you did. You don't want that to be something negative and unprofessional. Companies can be soulless mean entities but a negative personal impression only hurts your future prospects. Your local industry is not as big as you think it is and people love to gossip.
And really, if a company is so bad that people need to quit in a hilarious and scathing matter, is you leaving really going to change things? Unlikely. The best thing you can do is leave quietly with a smile on your face. Let them burn on their own.
I gave my notice politely and gratefully. I was late to my own leaving party because I worked a job through to completion. I was invited to take my old job back any time I wanted, and I got a great reference which helped me get a way better job. Nobody I knew still works there.
As good as it might feel, don't ragequit. Regardless of all the good you might have done before, people will remember the most recent big thing you did. You don't want that to be something negative and unprofessional. Companies can be soulless mean entities but a negative personal impression only hurts your future prospects. Your local industry is not as big as you think it is and people love to gossip.
And really, if a company is so bad that people need to quit in a hilarious and scathing matter, is you leaving really going to change things? Unlikely. The best thing you can do is leave quietly with a smile on your face. Let them burn on their own.
Day 1, Friday: Get a feel that it's not the right place. At the end of the day, get a comment I may not be back..somebody trying to be smart. Media company + software mix environment
Day 2, Monday: Ok Day
Day 3, Tuesday: Came in early at 7:30. Same media person querying about a new dev. who is late. This is a startup and they had said we have freedom to come and go. I went out at 10:30 for a doctors appointment, emailed them I will be back at 12. Got back to see the CEO emailed me saying bring back doctor's note.
Day 3, Quit via email from home. True feelings not shown. Never told them anything. Contract papers also seemed too strict with regards to joining competitors, never signed it though.
Day 2, Monday: Ok Day
Day 3, Tuesday: Came in early at 7:30. Same media person querying about a new dev. who is late. This is a startup and they had said we have freedom to come and go. I went out at 10:30 for a doctors appointment, emailed them I will be back at 12. Got back to see the CEO emailed me saying bring back doctor's note.
Day 3, Quit via email from home. True feelings not shown. Never told them anything. Contract papers also seemed too strict with regards to joining competitors, never signed it though.
Couple things.
1. They hired you, and maybe you didn't fit or enjoy the environment, or even like the people, but you should at least be grateful that they hired you and paid your bills. Try to maintain that attitude upon leaving.
2. You train people how they should treat you. Just because someone has a senior title means nothing. If I was asked to bow, I'd probably snort and smile, and be like 'haha hell nah!' - inotherwords, straightforwardly (but not rudely) let them know who you are. Maybe, at your previous job, you trained people to treat you that way.
1. They hired you, and maybe you didn't fit or enjoy the environment, or even like the people, but you should at least be grateful that they hired you and paid your bills. Try to maintain that attitude upon leaving.
2. You train people how they should treat you. Just because someone has a senior title means nothing. If I was asked to bow, I'd probably snort and smile, and be like 'haha hell nah!' - inotherwords, straightforwardly (but not rudely) let them know who you are. Maybe, at your previous job, you trained people to treat you that way.
The toes you step on today will eventually be connected to the ass you need to kiss tomorrow.
One time I put in my two weeks notice then I worked those two weeks to make sure the transition was smooth for my co-workers.
It was crazy! So professional and mature!
It was crazy! So professional and mature!
I sent an email why my boss was out one day saying, "I'm leaving at noon today, and this is my last day here." That was kind of fun.
Always resign with professionalism. Never burn bridges.
Bad to hear about your ambience in you're company, but stay professional!
Disclaimer: I do not always follow directly what's written bellow, because every case is different and not everything always apply. And sometimes you're bosses do not follow common sense :) Sometimes it's just quick call (actually it's always should be face-to-face call-first )
This is my perfect way to leave smoothly, if I am forced to do so. This works well when you don't have to start new job immediately.
1. Find out when next stage of project you're involved in ends: for example new release, working feature etc. In case it's not specified directly or job is done "very" agile - other convenient date for company and your colleagues/boss. It doesn't have to be far away, month or two is max (also have to be compatible with agreement, of course), but make sure it would be sufficient for you to close your major planned tasks and share knowledge with others. Don't talk about this with anyone you're working with.
2. Grab a coffee with your direct manager (or if it's start-up the CEO or other guy you report to) and have a talk about what you have done for project/company, what was good and what was not so great. Being honest (but nice!) is professional, because it gives company opportunity to fix things. I always tell what I learned in the place. Second step is telling that current opportunities and challenges does not seem so bright as when you started. Make clear that you're expecting to change job, if they cannot fulfill what you expect. Don't focus on money/benefits, but highlight what your work gives a company. Normally, after that this guy will talk with management or ask for few days to think about this. This is perfectly okay - go back to your things and act normally. Soon someone (probably same guy or his boss will offer your (if you're valuble) or tell you that's okay (if not so great). In both case make sure that they know about your conclusions from point and ask them if it's okay. They probably agree if you sound reasonable (in other case go you're way anyway, if it's legally okay)
3. Then it's your turn to take some time. Close the deal with new company and say aloud your decision. I think that all-team (with boss) stand-up is best time. Avoid informing some folks you like and other not, or other half-clear solutions. Again, share your thoughts from point 1 and ask if it works for your colleagues and how can you help them to smoothly take over your responsibilities and all howtos.
4. Do your job as always + share everything you know and do with as many connected with you guys as it's possible.
5. In last week invite whoever your want for a beer or buy some pizzas to the office. Or make a cake. Just have few hours for informal meeting with those great folks you worked with. Connect with all of them on the linked-in or exchange non-enterprise emails' addresses. I do not connect with colleagues (even ex) on private social medias, but it' s good to have way to reach them.
6. Do not hold personal conflicts or allow them to reflect your relations with not involved. Someday, that other silent junior you loved to work with will be hiring for his startup :)
Good luck!
Disclaimer: I do not always follow directly what's written bellow, because every case is different and not everything always apply. And sometimes you're bosses do not follow common sense :) Sometimes it's just quick call (actually it's always should be face-to-face call-first )
This is my perfect way to leave smoothly, if I am forced to do so. This works well when you don't have to start new job immediately.
1. Find out when next stage of project you're involved in ends: for example new release, working feature etc. In case it's not specified directly or job is done "very" agile - other convenient date for company and your colleagues/boss. It doesn't have to be far away, month or two is max (also have to be compatible with agreement, of course), but make sure it would be sufficient for you to close your major planned tasks and share knowledge with others. Don't talk about this with anyone you're working with.
2. Grab a coffee with your direct manager (or if it's start-up the CEO or other guy you report to) and have a talk about what you have done for project/company, what was good and what was not so great. Being honest (but nice!) is professional, because it gives company opportunity to fix things. I always tell what I learned in the place. Second step is telling that current opportunities and challenges does not seem so bright as when you started. Make clear that you're expecting to change job, if they cannot fulfill what you expect. Don't focus on money/benefits, but highlight what your work gives a company. Normally, after that this guy will talk with management or ask for few days to think about this. This is perfectly okay - go back to your things and act normally. Soon someone (probably same guy or his boss will offer your (if you're valuble) or tell you that's okay (if not so great). In both case make sure that they know about your conclusions from point and ask them if it's okay. They probably agree if you sound reasonable (in other case go you're way anyway, if it's legally okay)
3. Then it's your turn to take some time. Close the deal with new company and say aloud your decision. I think that all-team (with boss) stand-up is best time. Avoid informing some folks you like and other not, or other half-clear solutions. Again, share your thoughts from point 1 and ask if it works for your colleagues and how can you help them to smoothly take over your responsibilities and all howtos.
4. Do your job as always + share everything you know and do with as many connected with you guys as it's possible.
5. In last week invite whoever your want for a beer or buy some pizzas to the office. Or make a cake. Just have few hours for informal meeting with those great folks you worked with. Connect with all of them on the linked-in or exchange non-enterprise emails' addresses. I do not connect with colleagues (even ex) on private social medias, but it' s good to have way to reach them.
6. Do not hold personal conflicts or allow them to reflect your relations with not involved. Someday, that other silent junior you loved to work with will be hiring for his startup :)
Good luck!
[deleted]
I'll probably just tell my current employers that "It's been a great opportunity but this makes sense for me..." blah blah blah.
But of course part of me would like to go out, guns blazing, or just push the envelope to see how much I could get away with , George Constanza style, as a bit of a kiss off.
Anyone have a tale along these lines they'd like to share?
-Just so I don't seem too bitter... One member of the C-suite would publicly humiliate me every chance he got by awkwardly - and persistently - asking me to bow to him, which, because I'm junior, I did for the first two or three times until I stiffened my backbone and told him no.
He thought it was hilarious.